How to Spot Dating Scams and Fake Profiles (and What to Do)

The most common warning signs

1. They fall for you very fast. Declarations of love, or talk of a future together, within days or a few weeks.
2. They can't or won't video call. There's always an excuse: a broken camera, a bad connection, working somewhere remote.
3. They want to leave the app quickly. Moving to a private messenger removes the protections a platform offers.
4. Their story is dramatic and hard to check. Working overseas, on a ship, in the military, or running a business abroad.
5. They ask for money, in any form. It may be an emergency, a plane ticket, a customs fee, an investment or a gift card. The reason changes; the request doesn't.
6. The photos look too perfect, or they don't match the details in the profile.
7. They're vague about specifics. Where they live, where they work, their friends.
8. Their messages read like scripts. Generic, overly flattering, or oddly formal.

How to check someone is real

• Reverse image search their photos. Upload their pictures to a reverse-image search tool. If the photos belong to someone with a different name, or appear on many sites, that's a red flag.
• Ask for a short video call. Someone who's genuine will usually agree within a week or two, even if they're shy about it.
• Check that the details fit together. Mentioned jobs, cities and stories should be consistent from one message to the next.
• Search their name and details. People with real lives usually leave small traces.
• Trust the pace. If it feels faster than you'd like, slow it down and see how they react.

Fake profiles that aren't after money

Not every fake profile is a romance scam. Some are catfish, using someone else's photos for attention. Some are marketing accounts that try to send you to another site. Some are simply inactive profiles that were left up.

The habits above cover most of these too. A profile that never wants to meet, video call or move past the messaging stage isn't giving you much to go on. Keep your expectations in line with what you can verify.

If you think you've been targeted

1. Stop sending money or information. Cut off contact.
2. Keep the evidence. Save messages, usernames, payment records and screenshots.
3. Contact your bank or payment provider immediately. The sooner you report a payment, the better the chance of recovering it.
4. Report the profile to the app. Blocking and reporting protects other members.
5. Report it to the authorities. In many countries there's a national fraud reporting service, and reports help investigators.
6. Don't be embarrassed. These scams work on smart, careful people. Reporting helps.

Habits that keep you safe

• Use an email address that doesn't include your full name.
• Keep identifying details out of early messages.
• Meet in public and tell someone where you're going.
• Use the app's block and report tools without hesitation.
• If discretion matters, read our discreet dating guide and privacy and safety guide.

How a romance scam usually unfolds

Most romance scams follow a similar path. Knowing the stages makes it easier to notice where you are.

1. Contact. A friendly, attractive profile likes you or messages first.
2. Bonding. Lots of attention. Good morning and good night messages, compliments, shared interests that mirror yours.
3. Moving off the platform. A suggestion to continue on another messaging app.
4. A story. They mention a difficulty: a business problem, a family emergency, a blocked account, a trip that needs paying for.
5. The ask. Money, gift cards, crypto, or your help moving funds. It may start small.
6. Escalation. If you pay, there's another problem. If you don't, they turn cold or angry.

A warning for people who value privacy: blackmail

If discretion matters to you, there's one risk worth understanding separately. Some scammers try to get intimate photos or video from a target, and then threaten to send them to the person's friends, family or employer unless they pay. This is often called sextortion.

• Don't send anything you'd be devastated to see shared. That's the simplest protection.
• If someone threatens you, don't pay. Payment rarely ends it, and it often leads to more demands.
• Stop contact, keep the evidence and report it. Report to the app and to your local police or national fraud service.
• Tell someone you trust. Isolation is what these threats depend on.

A safe-meeting routine you can reuse

1. Do a short video call before meeting in person.
2. Meet in a public place with people around.
3. Tell a friend who you're meeting, where and when.
4. Arrange your own transport there and back.
5. Keep your drink with you and stay sober enough to make good decisions.
6. Check in with your friend afterwards.

If you're worried about a friend

People caught in scams are often embarrassed and defensive. Arguing with them tends to push them closer to the scammer. What works better:

• Ask questions rather than making accusations. “Has he asked you for anything?” is easier to answer than “he's a scammer”.
• Suggest checking his photos with a reverse image search together.
• Offer to be there when they call their bank.
• Remind them that these scams work on intelligent people.

Frequently asked questions